July 2, 2012

Know Thyself

Image via Time Magazine
For one of my summer courses' orientation activities, I had to take the Myers-Briggs personality test. I'm always interested in these sorts of things, even if some of them are hit and miss. This one was really accurate, though- almost like looking in a mirror. I'm surprised at how eye-opening it was (it was sort of like cracking open one really long fortune cookie) and have been mulling over the results ever since. According to the Myers-Briggs test, I'm an ENTJ (Extroverted Intuitive Thinking Judging). Among other things, it describes the ENTJ this way: 
"There is not much room for error in the world of the ENTJ. They dislike to see mistakes repeated, and have no patience with inefficiency. They may become quite harsh when their patience is tried in these respects, because they are not naturally tuned in to people's feelings, and more than likely don't believe that they should tailor their judgments in consideration for people's feelings... In their personal world, it can make some ENTJs overbearing as spouses or parents... ENTJs want their home to be beautiful, well-furnished, and efficiently run. They're likely to place much emphasis on their children being well-educated and structured, to desire a congenial and devoted relationship with their spouse."
I <3 Asians...seriously.
Well, if that doesn't sound like a natural born Tiger Mom/Wife, I don't know what does. Yikes. At least it does goes on to say:
"ENTJs who have managed to avoid many of the problems associated with their type are wonderful parental figures. They are remembered fondly and valued by their children for challenging them at every turn, and thus promoting growth and development. This type of knowledge-seeking usually becomes a lifelong habit for their children, who turn into responsible and independent adults."
I was sitting in front of the computer, open-mouthed. I kept thinking things like, "Am I going to ruin my poor baby boy? Am I bad wife?" I came to the conclusion that I can take the strengths of my personality work for me (being efficient and able to get things done) and challenge myself to overcome my weaknesses (impatience when I realize I can't run the entire universe and have everything go my way- ha). As a daughter of a parent who was an extreme ENTJ (so, it's hereditary...), I know firsthand what it's like to be on the receiving end of an overbearing, unbending personality- a Tiger Dad, if you will- and I still have resentments as an adult. In a way, though, I'm thankful because it is the best example to me of why and how I should be a better version of myself, both as a wife and a mama.

Anyone else out there fighting their inner Tiger Mom? Or have any words of wisdom to share? I'd love to hear your thoughts.


Hubba said...

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Michael said...

My comment is I am an ENFJ. At least that's what I was 10 years ago. I am going to see if I can analyze myself again.

lisacng said...

That "sin" poster is HILARIOUS! I got straight As all through school, even mostly college, but not b/c my parents were overbearing -- I pushed myself to be "perfect". I feared failing. Sometimes I wouldn't even try if I was afraid I'd fail. I'm trying not to rub off on my son. Today, I'm "trying" more things and being ok if I "fail". As for you, you could never be a bad mom or wife because of your personality. I am hot tempered but I am choosing to NOT let that be who I am now, even if it is my personality. So you too can choose to be a more balanced version of yourself, with all the good of your personality and other traits you admire. I'm trying to be more laid back like my husband and more silly like my son! You're doing great! The first step in change is knowing yourself.